Friday, October 29, 2010

Spirit

I was having difficulties with Reese and came across an article in a Parents magazine that was talking about "spirited" children.  Well I almost cried when I read some of the examples they gave and then they suggested this book for additional reading:

http://www.amazon.com/Raising-Your-Spirited-Child-Rev/dp/0060739665/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1288362240&sr=8-1

I was in Brandon on Monday, saw it and immediately bought it.  I am so glad I did. 

I can't even begin to explain what I was feeling before but maybe just that I didn't understand my little first born.  I am only about 1/3 of the way in and already I feel that now when she is doing something that used to make me mad I am now analyzing why she might be doing it.  Last night I was reading about introverts versus extroverts and I realized that she is an introvert like her daddy and I am most definitely an extrovert.  This means that in order for to get her energy and not completely melt down she needs to have time alone interspersed throughout the day.  She also needs more personal space, uninterrupted work time and time for reflection.  I was relaying this info on to Scott later last night and we began to see why when we plan big days and weekends with family why it usually ends with a major melt down and tears for both of us.  I also realized that she does not adapt easily or take well to new things.  These are not terrible things, but just things I need to help her learn how to deal with in ways that are socially acceptable.  It is not okay to hit Grandma because she is in your space and you have had too much stimulation... but if I can teach her to take a break when she needs one we can work on it together. 

I on the other hand being an extrovert also need things.  Above all this means time with people... and this doesn't mean little people.  I also need feedback and people to help me work out problems.  After reading about this I not only understand Reese a little more, but also Scott.  We are complete opposites and sometimes I don't understand why he has to go to his shop every night and be away from us.  But being an introvert he needs that time to recharge his batteries.  This is also why I need to still have my own activities that take me out of the house and into group activities with other adults.  

Basically all this blathering on is just to say that I am currently in love with this book.  I am having about 5 "A-HA" moments a day right now reading it.  A definite must have for those with a "spirited" child and a good read for every parent. 

TGIF and Happy Halloween!!!

3 comments:

Laura said...

Love books like that! I think I am just like Reese (so NOT an extrovert).

Corina said...

megs - i think my sister-in-law brenda read this book and raved about it. i am happy that you are learning more about ms. reese (and also Scott!!!) that is so cool. let us know about the other aha moments you have along the way!

June F. said...

That is so great Meghan! I'm glad you're learning about how to handle and understand Reese, that will make things so much better on you all.